Number 3 in an occasional series: 1 was staplers, and 2 was caravans.

I was amused to see in the latest fURNITURE@work catalogue™ that office chairs obviously have very high opinions of themselves - well, some at least.

In the lead, we have some very noble cities: Torino, Rome, Milano, Quebec, Athlone, Dresden, Paris etc; while a rather less glamorous herd canter behind: Mansfield, Southport, Cromer and Guildford for example. The Scottish Isles are coming up on the rails with Arran, Lewis, Skye, plus hangers-on Piper and Laird. Then we have the stragglers: rather surreal and off-message, geographically speaking, with Salvo (built-in rocket launcher?), Nero (tends to fiddle), Cluedo (wastes time with board games) and Chakra (no comment).

What are you sitting on? And don't say "My arse", à la Ricky Tomlinson, please!

Shaun Greenhalgh was recently jailed for more than four years for passing off various art forgeries, mostly antiquities.

He was caught because his father took three allegedly Assyrian bas-reliefs to the British Museum for examination in 2005. Unfortunately, the experts spotted several 'spelling mistakes' in the cuneiform script, and the game was up.

So, you have been warned: be sure to use the Word spellchecker with the cuneiform dictionary if you intend to defraud a major museum.

Read more:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/manchester/7090795.stm